Will there be tears? What kinds of methods do you use?

The short answer: most likely, yes. But tears in the face of change are normal and expected, and the amount of crying depends on the child's temperament and your commitment and consistency to the method we've chosen. We'll do everything we can to minimize tears, but it is impossible to go through this process (no matter how gentle the method) without some crying. It's okay for our children to be temporarily upset for a brief period of time, especially when they are learning a life skill that will benefit them for years to come. Any time our babies cry, it's hard for us to hear, but the tears will be more brief than you expect, and you have to keep in mind they are safe and learning something new. With every customized sleep plan, I prioritize your needs, goals, and philosophy, as well as your child's unique personality and well-being.

We are all human; any time we're required to change familiar habits, it can feel upsetting. Babies and young children are quick learners and more adaptable than we think.

If you're a baby who's been nursed to sleep every night and every nap for 5 months, and all of a sudden, your parent is laying you down awake, expecting you to fall asleep on your own, that's going to feel new and scary at first. Crying is expected because it's the baby's only way of communicating feelings of protest or frustration, but that doesn't mean it's traumatizing, and it doesn't make you a bad parent. We all grow and acquire new skills when we're in uncomfortable situations, like a baby learning to self-soothe when given the chance to fall asleep independently. How can they learn a skill like that if you don't give them the chance to try?

Similarly, a 4 or 5 year old might cry and beg for you to lay in bed with them until they fall asleep because they're suddenly scared to be alone or in the dark. But once they're asleep and you leave the room, they inevitably wake up alone and cry all over again, drawing you back into their bed, continuing the cycle. If you're looking to change this habit, it will definitely involve crying, but think about it - there was already crying involved even when you were doing what they asked. In the end, there will be little to no crying when your 4 or 5 year old learns how to feel happy and comfortable sleeping in their own room independently. You'll be teaching them valuable skills and habits that will last for years to come.

The various sleep methods I use fall along a spectrum from very gradual to fast-paced, and the level of crying varies for each child, depending on their personality and the method we choose to implement. My goal as your sleep consultant is to gather all the necessary information and familiarize myself with your child and your situation so that together, we can choose the sleep method and plan that you're most comfortable with, even if that means tailoring and combining various methods to create one that works for you. I will guide and support you step by step to help you achieve success, and I'll never ask you to do something that doesn't feel right. The ultimate goal of this process is healthy, restful sleep for the whole family, which means less tears for everyone!